Married to the Facebook Mob

Firstly this morning I was greeted with some disturbing news over facebook…news of a husband supposedly cheating on his wife and their impending divorce. Now this may sound cruel or cold but I don’t care how fucking hurt you are I don’t waste my time fumbling through people’s unflattering facebook pics and status updates about the weather to be dealt hard news about infidelity…Seriously is a fucking social networking site the appropriate place to discuss your husband’s alleged affairs so you can have 40+ people “comment” with shock and support at your news. Gee I may as well hope I get a terminal disease so I can update my status with “oh man…death impending… oh and it’s raining hard fo shizzle” and wait for the minor acquaintance masses to leave me misspelled and auto corrected messages of strength and smiley faced support. I say NO.

Tomorrow I start my new job and to say I’m a little freaked out is an understatement. I just pray that I don’t let my nervous energy result in humiliation via over sharing, memory lapse and/or a bout of slapstick work related comedy such as tripping over in my fancy work shoes or getting stuck in the lift.

Send me positive thoughts internet world and expect a facebook update that reads something like “totes starting new job tomorrow, celebrating with a few bevies and totes devo I can’t sleep in anymore..”

Enid Out

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One Response to Married to the Facebook Mob

  1. Clyde says:

    Baby i’d pay to see slapstick footage of u stuck in a lift or slipping on a bananna peel, I guess it stems from my original interest in you been ‘pushed over’ by a panther! Hope day is a success, it will be. First day nerves are always huge, but after the intros and dust settles you’ll feel fine. Mow

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